Kigali, 10th August

Hi people,
Somehow in the madness of buses, trucks and 4x4 transportation I seem to have covered a ridiculous distance (I make it 4660 kilometers from Bahar Dar to Kigali), not really sure what happened as the last 10 days seems like a bit of a blur, but I will try and make some sense of it as I write.
Leaving Bahar Dar was a bit of a shame as once more I could have happily stayed longer but I knew the road to Nairobi was going to be long and arduous. It is in fact the longest road in Africa, stretching from Addis Ababa all the way to Johannesburg, it is also probably the worst. After a lazy night in Addis spent doing as little as possible on the veranda while wasting the last of my Ethiopian currency I once more hit the bus station at 5.30 in the morning for another day of brutal travel in a crowded bus on trash roads. It turned out to be the most comfortable journey over the next four days. Not much can be said about this journey. I slept a lot and there wasn't much to see! We stopped for a night in Dilla, where due to the mighty British pound I enjoyed an apartment complete with hot shower, European style toilet, king size bed and kitchen/living area for the princely sum of one pound seventy five! I could have cooked but some of the Ethiopian passengers also heading to Kenya took me for qat, a sheesha pipe and more injera pancakes with goat, which, as nice as they are, do not make for a balanced 3 meals a day and to be honest I never want to eat them again.
Morning came too soon once more and a 7 hour bus journey later saw me standing in line at the Ethiopian border in Moyale to get an exit stamp. For no apparent reason it took me an hour and a half to get out of Ethiopia, and 53 seconds plus $50 to get into Kenya. It is probably the World's most budget border, consisting of two concrete huts, a barrier supposedly to stop cars and a dusty road. Over on the Kenyan side I was swarmed by money changers but luckily had already obtained some Kenyan shillings in the UK so pretty much told them where to go. Thanks to Mr. Wadey's epic PSHE classes in year 10 I already knew one phrase in Kiswalli, "pombe baridi sana", or "can I have a cold beer please". Feeling a new found connection with the Kenyan shop keeper (he answered in English, disappointingly) I enquired as to the availability of a truck to Nairobi(Ideally), Isiolo(2nd choice) or Marsabit(back end of the universe). Obviously I had to go to Marsabit. Rubbish. Having agreed an extortionately high price to sit on the back of the truck, I head to my room for a chill out ahead of my big day. Suddenly in burst a drunk Kenyan, claiming to be the driver and saying he needed me to pay him. I found it hilarious and in between laughing informed him of this and told him he would get paid when I got on the truck.
The late start at 9am saw no sign of the "driver" and while a hustling of Kenyans tried to fill the truck with as much Kerosene as humanly possible I went for breakfast with a pair of Ugandan brothers heading home after a business deal. Thankfully there was no injera on the menu just milky tea, sweet chapatis and some delicious meat samosas. Eventually at around midday we left the town itself, but were soon stopped again to collect our armed escort of Kenyan soldiers to protect us from bandits. They sat on the Kerosene chain-smoking and as we passed a flipped over truck complete with dead bodies I decided I was probably going to die either shot by bandits, in a gigantic kerosene and cigarette fueled fireball or crashing off the road. I started to make a list of things I would miss. To be honest death would have been preferable to what I had to endure. It was twelve hours sitting on the metal framework of a cattle truck getting launched around by a driver who can't have been much older than me and who seemed to hit every pothole on the road. We crawled into Marsabit absolutely covered in dust and I instantly crashed out in the first hotel I saw.
I woke up the next day at around 6.45 and was disgusted to find that I had missed the first, and seemingly only truck to Isiolo. The Ugandans also missed the truck so with my new found companions I spent the day happily complaining that there was nothing to do, pleased to have people fluent in English to complain to. Eventually at around four we found another truck and set of over the Kenyan section of the Sahara Desert (don't quote me on that, I don't know if it is part of the Sahara). It was too hot and too bumpy so I eventually decided I couldn't handle the absolute battering on the roof and decided to get in the truck itself. This was possibly the worst decision I have ever made, there was dust everywhere, the vibrations seemed to go through me, I could feel my teeth chattering and I thought I was going to throw up from my insides shaking around. When we had slowed down sufficiently I scrambled back onto the roof. However I was in a far less advantageous position to where I had been before and as a result of being a lot lighter than your standard Kenyan I started flying about 2 foot off the roof every time we hit as bump. At this point the roof started to collapse, it started to get dark and the driver decided to go faster. I pretty much gave up on survival and began to hope that it would be quick, wouldn't hurt and that just in case I did survive I wouldn't be too much of a wuss before we crashed so as not to lose face with the Kenyans. I will never complain about a bus again. Also at some point on this journey someone stole; my travel speakers(Bastards), My contact lenses (Why?) and didn't touch my money.
Somehow I survived and after arriving in Isiolo at 2, I caught the first bus, on paved roads to Nairobi. Having survived everything Northern Kenya had to throw at me I was sure Nairobi would be equally as tame and to be honest I didn't really feel in danger during my two day stint in the capital. I ate fast food, stocked up on provisions and generally enjoyed the atmosphere of a big city. I can see why it has a bad reputation but to be honest if you go out at night in the wrong area in England you might get robbed and it's pretty similar in Nairobi. Having decided going on Safari would be cheaper and more enjoyable in South Africa, there was nothing really I wanted to see in Kenya so I headed onwards to Kampala, Uganda. This entailed another 10 hour bus journey, but it was over night and short of waking up to pay for my visa I slept all the way through to the Ugandan capital. I finally stayed in a hostel rather than my own lonely hotel room, and after a day spent flying around on the back of a motorbike taxi to see Kampala and checking out the market me and a German guy, Jan, headed to "Sophie's Sauna" a "health club" in the suburbs. For $5 I got unlimited entry to the sauna, steam room, hot tub, swimming pool and a massage (no extras but thanks for the offer). They also had hot showers. I used them four times.
Feeling sufficiently relaxed I got up early the next day and headed to the bus station with the idea of going to Murchison Falls national park to go chimp tracking, first though I checked on the possibility of a bus to Kigali, Rwanda. The attendant at Jaguar coaches was not exactly helpful.
"Were fully booked for a month, but if someone doesn't turn up you can have their seat. You will still have to pay of course."
Anyway suffice to say I ended up in Kigali last night and have been relearning my A-level French since. I can actually remember a surprisingly large amount! It is a lovely city, much smaller than any other African capital I have been to so far and obviously benefiting hugely from the vast international aid Rwanda has received. This morning was spent sorting myself a flight to Tanzania as although I would like to bus it, after hotels, visas, food and general money it would take about 3 days and cost about $20 less. I also visited the genocide memorial, it was an incredible experience in a sick, really sad way and the contrast between the outside of the museum set in lovely gardens and the horrific images inside was weird. It was a very moving experience and the museum itself was very well done. (Not sure if thats the right way to put it but I can't really think of another way)
On a lighter note I am off to the Parc National des Volcans this evening, for some rest and relaxation and then on Monday I am going to visit a family of some of the last remaining Mountain Gorillas! I don't think I have ever been as excited as this and feel incredibly lucky to have got the 72nd out of 72 permits for Monday. It should be epic.

LOL

Jx